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Looking for par'Mach in All the Wrong Places (episode)
Worf helps Quark woo Grilka, his Klingon ex-wife. Summary Grilka, Quark's ex-wife, shows up on Deep Space 9, and while her intentions are unknown, Worf is smitten as soon as he sees her. In Quark's bar, Worf puts on a display to get Grilka's attention that includes throwing Morn out of his seat (after first apologizing in advance to Morn, sotto voce) and insulting her guard, Thopok. Tumek pulls Worf aside and informs him that Grilka is not interested, however. Grilka comes to Quark and conveniently mentions that her Great House, the House of Grilka, has suffered significant financial losses of late – but she doesn't ask for help, for Klingons do not dirty themselves with "filthy ledgers and bank accounts." Taking the hint, Quark "asks" to look at her financial records, and he helps her as she planned. The two of them spend a great deal of time together, and they genuinely seem interested in one another. However Quark is completely unfamiliar with Klingon mating rituals, so he asks Dax – and Worf – for help. They help him with Worf taking on a Cyrano de Bergerac-esque advisory role for Quark. After participating in a holosuite simulation with him, Grilka points out to Quark that he has just acted out one of the most romantic of Klingon operas, and she pointedly, and somewhat suspiciously, asks him, "What ''do you want, Quark?" His answer, that she, his "object of great value", may be worth all the latinum in the quadrant, cinches it. The two of them are in love. All seems well until Thopok, Grilka's bodyguard, becomes fed up with the offensive romance and declares that he cannot work for a House where a Ferengi is welcome. He challenges Quark to mortal combat. Meanwhile, Miles O'Brien views it as his duty to protect and assist Kira Nerys, seeing as she is now the surrogate mother of his child. With the blessings of Keiko, Miles has been giving Kira regular massages to help relieve her pain. While giving Kira a massage in her bedroom, O'Brien and Kira discover they have feelings for each other when Kira makes a remark about how she wouldn't mind spending three weeks in Ireland with Miles. O'Brien agrees then realizes what he said and feels guilty when Keiko walks into the room catching him giving Kira a massage. Keiko doesn't care, and says, "''Don't stop on my account." Later, Kira announces to Keiko and Miles that she is going to Bajor for a few days to relax in her friend's cabin. Miles is pleased, but Keiko is shocked by this news because she is worried Kira will go into labor. Keiko demands Miles go with her, and when he refuses, Keiko accuses them of fighting again and settles the debate – Miles and Kira will go to Bajor together. Now Quark is faced with the prospect of either losing Grilka or dying (for he obviously doesn't stand a chance against a Klingon with a bat'leth). Worf again helps the Ferengi; using a special device, Worf is able to control Quark's body movements and helps him defend himself. Despite a technical glitch that forces Quark to stall, ultimately, Quark hands the bodyguard's bat'leth to Grilka, proving his courage and sealing the deal. Quark is successful, but this leaves Worf alone. Not as alone as he thinks, however. Jadzia Dax, who until now has pressured him about the fact that there is nothing special about Grilka, claims she would be looking for someone more fun and "attainable" if she were him. Worf, who never has done well picking up romantic subtleties, still does not get the hint. Exasperated, Dax finally takes matters into her own hands and jumps Worf, shouting something in Klingonese, and, after a very brief sparring with bat'leth''s, ends up beginning a mating ritual of her own with him. About this time, Kira and Miles are meeting in a runabout to depart for the trip to Bajor. Before they can depart, Kira admits that the place she is going to relax is one of the most romantic sites on Bajor. On hearing this, Miles puts his foot down and says, "I'm not going!" They come up with a cover story to tell Keiko and Kira goes to Bajor alone. When the two couples – Quark and Grilka and Dax and Worf – come to the infirmary with broken bones and bruises aplenty, it is enough to convince Doctor Bashir that he is best off not asking how his patients received their wounds anymore. In a private room in the infirmary, Dax and Worf talk about what happened. Dax understands that Worf is unlikely to rush into marriage, even though tradition recommends it. They do agree, however, that they ought to pursue their relationship further. Memorable Quotes ''"Did you see her?" "The Klingon woman." "She was glorious!" : - Worf and Jadzia Dax "War! What is it good for? If you ask me, absolutely nothing." : - Quark, paraphrasing the song "A perfect evening." "Mmm. Almost. Her bodyguard was giving me threatening looks all night." "That is to be expected. The idea of a Ferengi courting a great lady is... offensive." "You know, it's attitudes like that that keep you people from getting invited to all the really good parties." : - Worf and Quark "This is ridiculous! I'm surrounded by corpses, my shoes are dripping in blood, and you want me to feel romantic? Why am I putting myself through this?" "Because later that night, Kahless and Lukara jumped on each other like a pair of crazed voles. Grrr!" : - Quark and Jadzia Dax "You people have rituals for everything except waste extraction! You must have a ceremony or secret hand-shake or something I can do!" : - Quark, facing the problem of dying, or being branded a coward and losing Grilka "Now you sound like a Ferengi!" "I'' am ''a Ferengi... and I recognize objects of great value. And you... may be worth all the latinum in the entire Alpha Quadrant." : - Grilka and Quark, right after playing Kahless and Lukara in the holosuite "You realize that according to Klingon tradition..." "According to tradition, we have to get married." "But as you keep insisting, you are not a traditional woman." "And the truth is, Worf... at heart, you're not much of a traditional man." : - Worf and Jadzia Dax "I will apologize for this at a later time. ''You are in my seat!" : - '''Worf', tossing Morn off his seat to impress Grilka "What have you been doing?" "'' The question is...what have WE been doing!" "''Never mind...I could do without that image. You just lie there, and...I'll treat you. What happened to you two?" "Well...um...If you really must know" "No! I don't need that image either. In fact, I'm just going to stop asking that question all together. People can just come in, and...I'll treat them." : - Bashir, Quark and Jadzia Dax Background Information * This episode is a sequel to . * The 1897 play served as the inspiration for this episode. In the play, by , two male characters, Cyrano and Christian, fall in love with the same woman, Roxanne. Cyrano is an unattractive man, but one of great wit; Christian is very handsome, but not particularly intelligent, so Cyrano agrees to help Christian woo Roxanne. In the famous seduction scene, as Christian attempts to win Roxanne's heart, Cyrano hides in a nearby bush and whispers the right things to say to Christian. There is no real equivalent of the Jadzia Dax character in the original play. The idea of doing an episode of ''Deep Space Nine'' based upon Cyrano de Bergerac was Michael Dorn's. (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Companion) * This is the first television episode directed by DS9 recurring guest star Andrew Robinson (Garak), although his character does not appear in the episode. It was an ironic coincidence that Robinson's first directing job would be this episode, based as it is on a stage-play, as Robinson had won two s in 1995, both for directing; one for 's , the other for 's . He later directed two episodes of Star Trek: Voyager, and . * The lack of explanation for exactly how the Virtual Control Device functioned was something which writer Ronald D. Moore did purposely. He felt that in the context of the episode, stopping to explain how it worked would have slowed down the action and taken away from the comedy, so he chose to leave it purposely vague; "Dax had invented it, and I wasn't interested in explaining it to the viewers. We just buy the premise and move on." (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Companion) * Armin Shimerman did many of his own stunts during the fight scene. He practiced at home for ten days prior to shooting the scene, and according to Shimerman, "I got pretty good with the bat'leth actually." Shimerman also worked with a mime artist to help him make it look as if the bat'leth had a mind of it's own at the end of the fight. (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Companion) * Although the A-story in this particular episode was a big hit with fans, writer Ronald D. Moore is more proud of the B-story involving O'Brien and Kira. According to Moore, "that was one of the most ''real storylines we've ever done. They were flesh-and-blood people in a very believable situation, reacting believably''." (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Companion) * The title is the second longest in all of Star Trek's television episodes. The first is . * The title comes from a line of the famous country song " ", a hit of in the '80s, with the Klingon word for "love" instead. * Another musical reference: when Quark and Grilka are discussing her visit, he says "War, what is it good for? If you ask me, absolutely nothing", which may have been a tongue-in-cheek nod to the Edwin Starr song "War". * Tumek's line "The challenge has been given and accepted. Let no one interfere." closely resembles T'Pau's words from . * Joseph Ruskin (Tumek) had previously appeared as Galt in , and as Odo's Cardassian Informant in . He would subsequently be seen as a Son'a Officer in , and as a Vulcan Master in . * Phil Morris (Thopok) had previously appeared as an unnamed child in , and as Cadet Foster in . He would subsequently be seen as Remata'Klan in , and as John Kelly in . According to the Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Companion, Morris auditioned for the role of Benjamin Sisko but was turned down because he was too young. Video and DVD releases *UK VHS release (two-episode tapes, CIC Video): Volume 5.2, . *As part of the DS9 Season 5 DVD collection. Links and References Guest Stars *Rosalind Chao as Keiko O'Brien *Mary Kay Adams as Grilka *Joseph Ruskin as Tumek *Phil Morris as Thopok References Barak-Kadan; Basai master; Bolian; botanical pathology; Holana River; House of Grilka; Ireland; Kahless the Unforgettable; Klingon opera; Lingta; Lukara; Maparian ale; Mekro'vak region; Musilla Province; optronic relay, Parada; pazafer; Qam-Chee; racket; Right of Proclamation; Shakaar Edon; springball; targ; Tygarian |next= }} Category:DS9 episodes de:Gefährliche Liebschaften es:Looking for par'Mach in All the Wrong Places nl:Looking for par'Mach in All the Wrong Places